NES #40 - The Goonies II

Okay so this is a very strange game, so I apologize if this is a weird entry. I'm just not quite sure how to describe this one. It's one of those really old NES games that everyone has a copy of, acknowledges as a classic, and kinda hates. I know very few people who enjoy this game as more than a curiosity or signal of things to come. I mean how could you? It's really old and really weird.

The premise itself is odd. I always thought that there was a movie sequel to the original Goonies out there somewhere that I had simply never seen. However, this sequel doesn't exist. Instead this is, I believe, the very first video game exclusive sequel. That concept might actually work today, but this was the NES in 1987. If you played the game with no manual or guide you would have no idea that there was supposed to be any kind of story behind it. You're a kid in a weird building with a yo-yo fighting bats, and that's really about as deep as it gets.

Actually you are saving the other Goonies and rescuing a mermaid. Also, the Fratellis are after you again, but I don't know why. An opening movie would've been helpful, but they hadn't thought of that yet. You play as Mikey, but the other Goonies are completely generic and unnamed. You can't tell your Chunks from you Datas in this one. Anyway, that's about as much of the story as I can explain here. I'm sure you can find the instruction manual online somewhere and read more about it. People used to read more papery things back in the 80s.

So here's the way the game goes in case you've never played it. The game is split up into"action" and "adventure" sections. In the "action" sections you're trapped in this really weird place that is hard to define. You're in a volcano, and then you climb up a ladder and you're in Greenland. You go through a door and you're in a cave. It's something like that. The place has a front side and a back side so be ready to get really confused all the time. You get some weapons, but none of them are all that effective. Also, the controls are a bit sluggish. All in all it's pretty bland, but at least it's fun to watch the suddenly changing scenery.

I can handle a bland game, but what really gets to me is the "adventure" section. What this consists of is a series of identical rooms. Sometimes they have people to talk to and sometimes they have hidden secrets. Sometimes they have locked safes that have extremely unhelpful hints in them. I loved wasting a key to find out that "it's fun to play Goonies 2." Do you know how many bats I had to kill to get that stupid key? Where's an interrobang when I need it? Anyway, all of these empty rooms have four walls and a ceiling. There could be more treasures hidden behind them, so lets hit every wall in the whole game. To do this you just pull up your item screen, pick your fist or hammer, and then push the button on the wall you want to smash. Oh, and you will get different results with different items, so you will have to hit each wall in each room with both you fist and your hammer. I guess sometimes a hammer would smash right through that extra key ring or pair of Goonie shoes, so you need a less powerful fist to get the job done. So yeah, this process takes about five minutes per room and involves no skill or thought. It's just an endurance test that tries to show off that phony 3D room effect that they loved so much in the 8-bit era. However, this ain't Phantasy Star. It's not even Fester's Quest. Oh, and you also have to hit an old man with a hammer five times.

You know, I hadn't really planned on being so hard on this game. It doesn't seem like it's that bad. But at the same time maybe it is. Maybe it's a visionary game that pointed to the future, or maybe it was more of a case of the programmers being in over their heads. I honestly can't tell you. This game is more confusing to talk about than it is to play, and that's saying something. I'm sure the debate about this game has been raging ever since '87. Or am I the only person still talking about it? I sure hope not.

NES #39 - Gradius

Oh yeah I finally beat Gradius, yet another game in my recent "suddenly really good at Nintendo" streak. This is one of the oldest space shooters for NES, and it really set the blueprint for games to come. It's also not that difficult, but I sure had a hard time with it. I really suck at shooters in general. That's why you won't read too many Turbografx reviews on here. I always blame the fact that I'm left handed which prevents me from pushing the fire button fast enough. Although I think it's actually me and not the controller. Anyway, I was finally able to cross this one off the list.

The battles between me and Gradius are legendary. I bought this game in college and would go on spurts where I would play it every day. This was always my night class game because I could get in a few rounds quickly before I had to go to bed. Sadly, I have a lot more memories of evenings being spent failing at old games than I do hanging out with friends in college. I probably shouldn't explore that fact too much other than to say it was their fault and not mine.

Anyway, this game used to always drive me crazy. I would either get killed by those Easter Island heads, giant rock (or granola) monsters, or get all the way to the end only to be killed by that blue wall. If you don't fly in front of that blue wall you will die, and it would be so long between trips to the last level that I would forget where it was. I also remember that I was able to skip level four just about every time because of a built in game mechanism. I always thought it was from how many point you got, but I foolishly looked it up and found out it was from how fast a certain boss was defeated. After I read that I was never able to skip the level again. Sometimes you're just better at things you don't know how to do.

What was interesting about my final run was that about half way through the game the graphics started to glitch. This is happening more and more with my NES which worries me a little bit. The screen got covered in vertical lines, and everything was much harder to see. I got so awesome at this game that I didn't even need to see it properly. Of course the bullets flying at me had streamers on them which made them a bit easier to see, but it was also very hard to tell which part was projectile and which part was graphical glitch. I'm just gonna pretend like I'm even cooler for beating the game while it was glitchy.

I think most people who have played this game will call it a classic, and I'm certainly not going to argue with that. I like how it plays like one long level instead of six short ones. I also enjoy the power-up system that does require at least a little bit of thought. I guess the biggest complaint that there is no final boss, but with such a crazy final level I'm not sure if that's a bad thing. Not every game has to have a final boss.

So I can finally lay Gradius to rest and move on. It was a difficult journey, but one that I'm glad I took on. It's times like this that remind me how many good games there are on NES. Even in the early days people didn't know what they were doing they were pumping out classics like this. Actually, it's hard to think of a system that had a better first two years. If this was the kind of blog that people actually commented on I'm sure you'd all have something to say about that.

NES #38 - Rygar

Wait I actually beat Rygar!? Well that's it, I can do anything now. It's time to go back and beat every other game that has been bugging me for the last 20 years. I'm looking at you Fester's Quest! Okay, so maybe that's pushing it a little bit, but finally finishing Rygar did make me feel a little cocky. The part that makes no sense to me now is that it wasn't even that hard. It only took about two hours, and none of the bosses were particularly difficult. So why did it take me so long to beat this one?

I guess the easy answer is that this is one of those infamous NES action RPGs with no save feature. It's similar to Sunsoft games like Blaster Master and the aforementioned Fester's Quest in that it takes a good amount of time and must be done all at once. Actually, this is probably the most talked about feature of Rygar. It's often referred to as "that game with the super yo-yo and no password." However, when I finally played it for real the game only took about two hours. Sure it's not Contra length, but it's certainly an acceptable length especially for a kid. Now that I have been through it I think there were a couple other reasons why I never finished this one, and they both have to do with the limitations and strengths of the NES.

Rygar is an early NES game, and its limitations made this one difficult for me as a kid. This game can get confusing easily. The backgrounds all look similar, and most doors take you to the same giant old guy giving you cryptic clues. I hate cryptic NES clues! It's easy to get lost, especially early on without all the items. The controls are another issue. Was anyone able to figure out how to use the wind pulley without looking it up? I watched internet videos of it and it still confused me. You have to walk up to a rope just the right way and wait for the click. If you do it wrong you're going right into the water and back to the beginning of the level. This certainly held me back as a kid. Also, it's one of those games where after you die your life only replenishes part way. This wouldn't be a problem if live was easier to come by, but you really have to kill a lot of enemies to get hearts back. These are all the classic problems of early NES games, but it's still not the whole story. I think the reason I had so much trouble beating this game is related to the reason why I still spend so much time playing these old games today.

When I was a kid I found this game far too captivating to finish. It was like Metroid in that it transported me to a different world. I got caught up in the music and atmosphere. When I rented it, which I did frequently, I didn't even want to finish it. That would almost ruin the experience for me. I just wanted to wander around that alien world with my strange weapon and fight spinning lizards and spiny turtles all day. It wasn't until I was much older that beating this game even registered as a possibility in my mind, and by that time I was too busy to sit down for what I thought would be an entire day and finish it. Luckily my schedule allows me long weekends occasionally, so I can go back and play games like this.

So yeah I beat Rygar, and it didn't diminish the magic very much. I still felt a little like I did 20 years ago when I first started playing NES. I could talk about how easy the last boss was or how there wasn't that much of an ending, but that's all beside the point. This is one of the truly great games on the greatest gaming system of all time. You can play this game to beat it, you can play it to see how high you can get your experience, or you can just play it for that great music and nostalgia for your earlier days. The NES is a world all its own, and you are free to explore it in any way you see fit.

NES #37 - Tiny Toon Adventures

Okay so I'm getting myself all confused. Right now I'm about seven games behind, and I can't exactly explain why. It's not like I'm too busy or disillusioned with my blog. My posts are still fairly popular. I somehow just got behind and ended up with a half dozen or so games to write about. What's worse is that I remembered that I beat Tiny Toon Adventures and didn't have it on my list. Sadly, this is about all I remember. I guess I should go back and play some of it again, but I'll see how well I can do without actually remembering the game.

This is a standard platform game as you might expect. It has a world map, but that is purely for show. There are no branching paths or secret spaces. You can't even move your character on it. So you play as Buster in this one, but if you get a special item you can switch between Dizzy, Furball, or Plucky. The difference between them is that Buster has no special skills. He was always the vanilla of the Tiny Toons world, and it's no different here. Plucky can fly, Dizzy can spin, and Furball can climb. All of these things are better than being able to simply walk around. Well, Dizzy's probably worse, but not by much.

This is one of those games with unlimited continues and a few difficult levels. This means that while this game is short, you will probably have to play it a while to actually beat it. This is always a little difficult for me. I know that I spend about 90 percent of my personal time playing video games, but it's hard for me to play a game longer than an hour without getting frustrated. I have never have been able to focus on one thing for more than a half hour or so. Maybe that's why I'm getting so far behind. Anyway, after about 90 minutes I started to get real angry at this game. Every time I died I wanted to stop playing and hide this game in the bottom of my closet where it could no longer hurt me. However, if I stopped than all that time would be wasted. Luckily I didn't let this game defeat me, and I was still able to have a nice weekend after I was finished. I remember fighting Montana Max, but I don't remember what happens after that. I'm sure it was disappointing.

I will say to this game's credit it's about 100 times better than its sequel. This game is actually set up like a real game. It even has a Wackyland level that actually kind of looks like Wackyland. Why was it so hard to get it right in the second game? Of course I can't play through a game series in reverse and say they fixed all the problems. However if you are going to play through both of them I highly recommend playing through this one second. At least it won't make you hate yourself. Is that a compliment? I guess it's close enough.

NES #36 - Bucky O'Hare

I felt like getting back to my roots and writing about NES this time around, so I picked the type of game that NES did best. This is a game about an anthropomorphic rabbit in space and his other space animal buddies. Now I know that this sounds like a Star Fox clone, and you're probably congratulating yourself for solving that puzzle, but in truth Bucky O'Hare is a much older franchise. It started as a comic book in the late 70s and in the early 90s was turned into a Saturday morning cartoon.

Does anyone remember watching the cartoon? I know that I looked forward to it every week, but it came on at something like 7 in the morning. Even at that age I had a little trouble getting up so early. It didn't come on quite as early as Widget or reruns of The Tomfoolery Show, but it wasn't in one of the prime slots like Garfield and Friends or Bugs Bunny and Tweety. Am I getting off track?

So let's run through the checklist to see how good of a game Buck O'Hare is going to be. It is a side scrolling platform game so we can check that box. It's based on a cartoon, that's another one. It was made by Konami so that's a plus. It has a level and character select feature with a world map. You know I love those. Hey, that's all the check marks. This game's going to be great!

Okay so maybe it isn't great, but it's still a hidden gem. It has challenging and well designed levels, but I guess the problems is that some of the levels were designed for other games. Yeah, this game is kind of a thief. Playing through it, I noticed some familiar layouts and enemies. It had a section that looked like the first level of Contra, those moving blocks from the Mega Man series, and elements from the Mario games. Of course all the games it stole from were classics, and they are blended in nicely with some more original ideas. I guess this is sort of like the Oasis of gaming. Sure it stole, but at least it stole from the best.

I suppose the most important feature in this game is the ability to change between characters. In each of the first four levels Bucky is able to save one of his companions who each have their own unique skill. Bucky can do a charge jump, Blinky can blast through blocks, Dead-Eye can climb walls and so on. There will be parts where you will have to use a certain character, and this makes for some more interesting gaming. It also has one of my favorite features of old gaming. To switch between characters you only have to push a button and they appear where your previous character was just standing. There is no explanation for why one character turns into another. Is the ship beaming people up? Maybe that human kid invented a machine that can teleport people? It seems like the group would be able to get through those planets easier if they used teamwork instead of fighting individually. Anyway, the part I love is that it doesn't really matter. The only explanation you needed back then was that it's how the game works. If this game came out now I'm sure there would be some convoluted explanation that only confused things. I'm happier with the old system.

Another thing I enjoy about this game is how it keeps the action moving. When you get a game over you start back in the section that you died in. There's no starting over from the beginning of the levels in this one. This is good for a couple of reasons. First of all it allows the levels to be more difficult. Some points seemed impossible upon my first inspection, and only became possible after I failed a few dozen times. The other thing is that it keeps the player from giving up. If I had to start over at the beginning of those difficult levels every time I got killed by a boss than there's no way I would beat the game or even want to. And I died many times at the bosses. They are thoughtful and challenging. This game is perfectly designed for what it is, and you can't always say that about franchise games.

The NES had a difficult track record with licensed games. Almost every game based on a movie sucked. Almost every game based on a game show or board game was too simple. The few that are based on live action tv shows did not fare well. The one area where they found success was cartoon adaptations. Maybe it's because they fit the look of the NES so well, or because with a cartoon series you could take more dramatic license, but whatever the reason the batting average for cartoon games is very high. Now Bucky O'Hare isn't as good as Duck tales or as fondly remembered as Rescue Rangers, but it certainly belongs in the same discussion even if it as game you've never heard of based on a cartoon that you never knew existed.

Nintendo DS #4: Professor Layton and the Curious Village

Professor Layton

Well here's a game that reminds me of a couple different things from my childhood, and isn't that one of the things video games do best? This is an easygoing game that combines point and click adventures with brain teasers. It reminds me of a book of riddles that I used to have as a kid. Actually, it has a couple of the same puzzles. Getting the tennis ball out of that hole is easier than you think.

So Professor Layton and the Curious Village is an easygoing murder mystery with a nice young adult vibe. Is that an odd description? Well it's not really that odd of a game. You play as the plucky mystery solver as he tries to uncover several mysteries involving a strange little town. The game is done in a first person point and click style like Myst or Shadowgate. The trick is that whenever you approach someone and talk to them you almost always get a request to solve a puzzle.

The puzzles are widely varied. Some of them require you to pick from several different choices. Some of them ask you to write in your answer to a logic puzzle. Some of them are more puzzle game based and require a bit more action. Many of them are intriguing, but they are not flawless. So many of the puzzles can be solved by guessing 0,1, or either the highest or lowest number. I was able to solve several puzzles that I didn't even understand by simply picking 1. Another problem is that it's a little too easy to cheat. Want to save your hint coins and get a very high score? Just save before you talk to a person, reveal the three clues, guess until you find the answer, and then reset. I know that's a cheap strategy, but this is a cheap world. Probably most people out there red all the solutions on an online faq anyway. Now I never did anything like this, but I sure thought about it at times.

Well I know that this is mostly just a description of the game, but I think that's somewhat appropriate. Don't get me wrong though, this game does have a lot of character. The visuals are quite nice, and everybody's got a funny British accent. The mystery really goes in an unexpected direction so it kept me interested. Yep, this is a high quality gaming experience.

SNES #5- Final Fantasy: Mystic Quest

Yes, I'm following up Final Fantasy 13 with that fake Final Fantasy game that was only released because people thought Americans were too dumb to play real RPGs. Actually, the two games are much more similar than they initially appear, and I'm glad I played them back to back. They are both action oriented games that are considered black sheep in the series. At least 13 is considered a real Final Fantasy game. Mystic Quest is another story altogether.

When I was a kid I didn't think there was anything strange about this game. It was just the next Final Fantasy game. The gameplay was different, but this did not seem unusual. Developers took much more radical chances with sequels back then. This wasn't too long after we had the side scrolling Zelda game and RPG styled Castlevania game. So I remember renting this one a couple of times and actually being a little excited about how easy it was. I could never beat games that I rented, especially RPGs. With this one I felt like I actually had a chance.

Of course it wasn't too long until we all figured out that this game was different. It was probably around the time Final Fantasy 3 came out. That game was a life altering experience. It was one of the most in depth and exciting games to ever come out, and we all knew that Mystic Quest wasn't in the same league. I'm not sure how you figured stuff out back then, but one of my friends stumbled on the secret. Mystic Quest was made as a simple starter RPG for the American audience. The genre had never sold well in this country, so this was a trick to lure people in.

Of course, the game developers made some odd choices in what they thought the mass market would enjoy. It must've been bad market research or something. They thought that people really liked using heal potions and not knowing how many hit points they had left. There are some points in this game where I was using heal potions every other attack, and the life bar only confuses things more. It's shown as a bar, but enemy attacks are shown as a number above your head. It can get confusing. They must've also decided that people hate exploring, because you almost always know where you are going. The game is mostly stripped down to fighting battles and visiting towns. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it can be a shock to the system if you've played other FF games and are expecting something like that.

I really hate to dwell on what this game lacks, but it's hard to avoid. This's game's reputation is based on it being a failed experiment. I know this games gets a hard time among fans, but I actually think it's pretty good. I think it's fun that you get items which let you interact with the environment more. I also think it's fun that the monsters will transform as you hit them. That's something that not even FF3 did. All in all this is a fun little game that is good for a couple afternoons and isn't hurting anyone. I certainly don't see a problem with that.


(As a bonus here's the infamous brain ad for the game. I love how they make the game sound like it's both really hard and really easy. It sure confused me in 1993.)